The Essence of Love

Everybody, at some point in their lives wonders about love, what it is and whether it’s real or not. 

The concept of “love” can’t really be defined, it ranges from celestial connections to a higher power to more physical attraction or intense emotional bonds. 

The pursuit of love is universal, yet people are always skeptical about its authenticity. 

To unravel the mystery of whether love truly exists, maybe delving into scientific insights can provide a clearer perspective on what transpires within our bodies when we experience this enigmatic sensation. 

Neurological origins

Contrary to the poetic notion of love being from the heart, scientists place its origins squarely in the brain. 

The brain releases a cocktail of hormones, which then give rise to an intricate array  of emotions such as euphoria, pleasure, and bonding. 

Oxytocin, often referred to as the “love hormone,” is particularly associated with feelings of attachment and bonding. 

Love as an addiction

Some scientists draw parallels between falling in love and the experiences of a drug addict, citing similar surges of dopamine. 

The intense rush felt when falling in love is likened to the euphoria induced by substances like cocaine. 

This addictive aspect of love prompts the brain to seek out the source of this rewarding feeling, leading to profound connections or infatuations. 

Correspondingly, the aftermath of losing a loved one or experiencing a breakup mirrors withdrawal symptoms akin to substance addiction. 

The elusive definition

The elusiveness of love stems from the diversity of interpretations. What some perceive as love, others might label as infatuation. 

There is also an ongoing debate on whether love is an innate biological construct or a social construct perpetuated by the media.

While scientific investigations into love are ongoing, yielding insights into brain activity and reward systems, definitive evidence regarding the concrete existence of love remains elusive. 

What remains evident is that studies consistently reveal the activation of specific brain regions when individuals undergo experiences associated with love. 

The question of whether love exists persists, evoking a range of perspectives and beliefs. 

While scientists try to provide a glimpse into the neurological underpinnings of love, the essence of the emotion continues to elude conclusive definition.

The concept of Love through philosophy

Personally, I realized an important lesson about Love a long time ago when I was studying philosophy at university and my then lecturer, while discussing Love, stood up and said: “If a certain part of your brain were taken away, you would no longer be able to feel anything. You would just be a living empty body, without emotion. And most of you would immediately stop believing in God or Love.”

After this class, I went home asking myself: “So does love only arise because of the way my brain works? And if I stopped feeling emotions, would I also stop feeling love for the things I care about? Is Love really that fragile?”

I asked myself this question for a few days and then decided to turn to my teacher to better understand it.

He had me sit down in an empty classroom and began writing on the board, “Love is not just what you feel. Love is who you are.”

Then he sat down next to me and said: “Your emotions are a tiny part of what you know as Love. Real Love does not lie in your heart or your mind. It is the invisible bridge between your emotions and your intellect. It belongs to you only when you choose to become Love every day of your life.”

That very day I realized that Love is much more than our emotions.

On the contrary, it is a clear and thoughtful choice we make every day of our lives.

If you met someone new tomorrow and fell completely in love with them, you would feel after a while that the flame that ignited your Love through passion is growing weaker. This does not mean that Love is ending. It means that real Love now begins when you decide to turn what was ignited by passion into a real and deep connection between two human beings.

Love is more than just a feeling. Love arises from the intelligence of the heart, which lies in who we choose to be and how we choose to act every day, even when our emotions tell us otherwise.

This is where the power of Love lies. In the ability to move beyond temporary emotions and find the Truth.

With every person we meet along the way, there is always the opportunity to build both beautiful and loving relationships, as well as toxic and poisonous ones.

And which direction we end up choosing between these two options depends on our daily choices. And we all know firsthand that sometimes people who have nothing in common or completely different interests manage to have beautiful relationships.

This is because the choice they make every day to love each other is always above anything else that may come their way in life.

And that’s because true Love has nothing to do with our temporary emotions or current head state. Love is not temporary, and it is not shaped by how we feel, but by how we act.